• Updated October 10, 2022
(Sarah)Oh my god, David. Look at her brief.It is so … short. [scoff]It looks like one of those emergency appeals.But, you know, who understands the Shadow Docket? [scoff]They only take those cases because they have novel procedural posture, ‘kay?I mean that brief, is just so, short!I can’t believe it’s written so fast, it’s got, like typos! I mean— gross. Look!She just got relief!(Chief Justice Roberts)I like fast briefs and I can not lieYou other judges can’t denyWhen counsel walks in with a brief that is thinAnd asks us to step inYou get stayed! Per the APA‘Cause the facts here aren’t OKWhat you did was arbitraryAnd executive action is scary!Oh baby, I wanna write for youPer curiam will not bore youMy colleague, he’s OriginalBut this brief you filed makes me feel TextualOoooh, gov’ment litigant?Wanna ignore precedent?Well brief me, write swift,‘cause you ain’t that average plaintiff!I’ve seen them pleadin’To hell with where that's leadin’She’s pled, Club FedHas it going like Judge WillettI’m tired of law reviewsSayin’ history is the thingTake the average Justice and QP that?It’s gotta pack much textSo This Honorable? (Yeah!) Court? (Yeah!)Has the appellant got the brief? (Hell yeah!)Tell ‘em: file it! (File it!) File it! (File it!)File that healthy briefBaby got text
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