Binaries for Me, Spectrums for Thee

Dear Reader (Including those of you who think “Thighland” would be quite the interesting amusement park),
I’m writing this while sitting on a concrete slab outside the Jackson Hole Welcome Center. It’s the only spot I could find where it was:
A) shady (as in, protected from the direct gaze of damnable Helios, not as in Jerry Falwell’s “What I did on my Summer vacation” Instagram feed)
B) possible to smoke a cigar legally