I’m going to start with a story I shared yesterday in our new Good Faith podcast. When I served in Iraq my primary job function was something called “operational law.” Think of it as the law of war concretely applied to rules of engagement decisions (“can we bomb this target?”) and detainee operations. My secondary function was military justice, assisting the command in maintaining military discipline. 

But I had a third function as well, legal assistance. I was the only lawyer in a combat arms unit of almost 1,000 men in an isolated base miles from any external support. So I put out the word—I’ve got an open door. Come to me if you’ve got questions about anything even tangentially related to law, especially if it involves your family.

This is where you learn that the costs of a deployment extend beyond the fear, the stress, the wounds, and the grief of losing brothers. I can’t forget their stories.

There was the soldier who returned home on mid-tour leave and was greeted in the airport by his wife, his son … and his wife’s new boyfriend.