Word to the Wise Guys

We’re arguing about words when we should be arguing about reality.

By
313
President Joe Biden addresses the North America's Building Trades Unions legislative conference at the Washington Hilton on April 25, 2023 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images)

Hi,

I have two separate things I want to vent about, but in deference to my principled both sides-ism, I will endeavor to connect them so as to ensure I annoy everyone. 

Let’s start with Trump. 

Here’s a hypothetical ripped from the headlines. Let’s say Donald Trump took home the “NOC List” of Mission Impossible fame that contains the names of all our secret agents around the world. The list—duh—is classified. Everyone with an ounce of common sense understands why it’s classified. Now, imagine Trump says it’s fine for him to have it because he declassified it before he left office. Let’s even say he actually did. According to Trump’s defenders, it’s fine for him to have it because it’s no longer classified. Indeed, because it’s no longer classified it’s fine for him to show it to people, or leave it by the crapper at Mar-a-Lago for one of the Chinese agents prowling the resort who hasn’t been caught yet.  

This content is available exclusively to Dispatch members
Try a membership for full access to every newsletter and all of The Dispatch. Support quality, fact-based journalism.
Start Your Free Trial
Already a paid member? Sign In
313
By
Comments (313)
Join The Dispatch to participate in the comments.
 
  1. Mark

    Awesome. Hilarious. Good stuff here.

    Collapse
  2. Avatar photo
    Anne W (Raw5254)

    Thanks for making me laugh. I was late getting to this, and glad I didn’t miss it.

    Collapse
  3. Avatar photo
    Ben Connelly

    Even left-leaning friends and relatives of mine tend to see the signs of Biden’s age. They may have voted for him, but some wish the party would put up somebody different.

    Collapse
  4. Graeme.Edgeler

    Is it possible that "God Save the Queen" is a joke about Republicans/republicans?

    Collapse
  5. Ben.Bobbitt

    “… we talk about words as if they have power independent of the things they describe.”

    I think this is also why we have to change the words we use to describe lots of other things that refer to people or maladies and conditions from which people suffer. Certain words can’t be used anymore because they’re “hurtful” but really it has nothing to do with the “word” but with the actual real thing it refers to, which we wish weren’t true or didn’t exist. So we pick a new (usually more clinical and multi-syllabic) word or phrase as if its usage will somehow make the underlying reality go away. Eventually the new term loses its clinical detachment and we have to change it again in some desperate and doomed attempt to escape the realities of the human condition.

    Collapse
    1. Avatar photo
      Michael Dan Martin

      Yes and yes. My Dad had polio in one of his legs when he was four. At that time, physical therapy wasn’t a phrase anyone would think to utter, so he grew up with an atrophied leg a few inches shorter than the other. When “handicapped” became the “correct” way of addressing his condition I remember him snorting and saying he wasn’t handicapped, he was a cripple. Changing words didn’t make him walk any better.

      Collapse
  6. Michael Bates

    Joe’s talked strangely for a long time. At a 1987 press conference centering on allegations of plagiarism. “By the time the war movement was at its peak when I was at Syracuse, I was married. I was at law school. I wore sport coats.”

    Collapse
  7. Kittcomm

    My father used to tell me that one candidate was always worse than the other. Which is why I would never opt for a third-party candidate, or sit out the election. If it’s Biden vs Trump, to me the choice is obvious. I don’t care if Biden needs a 6 hour nap every day and is only vaguely aware of what’s happening. Putting Trump back in the White House would be madness.

    Collapse
  8. Jonathan Prentice

    Haha I do enjoy your humor sir. Keep up the good work !

    Collapse
  9. Jim

    Jonah, your writing is delightful, and the point you make is so important. Thank you.

    Collapse
  10. Neelthakrebew

    Jonah-- Ditch that badge of shame--Both-Sides-ism!

    I am a proud Neither-Side-Completely-ist.

    It's hard to belong to any group wholeheartedly when you have an eye out for human imperfection.

    Collapse
Load More