Happy Friday! Our rule of thumb is that once an internet joke reaches Congress, it’s officially dead.

Rest in peace to “Barbenheimer.”

Quick Hits: Today’s Top Stories

• A federal judge rejected a request from Jacob Chansley—the infamous January 6 “QAnon Shaman”—to throw out his conviction for obstructing an official proceeding while rioting at the Capitol. Chansley received a 41-month prison sentence after pleading guilty in September 2021. Chansley cited footage—aired on Tucker Carlson’s Fox News show in February—of himself walking with Capitol Police officers, but U.S. District Court Judge Royce Lamberth concluded the footage was “devoid of context.”
• Republican Sen. Chuck Grassley on Thursday released an unclassified FBI document detailing a confidential informant’s unconfirmed allegations that then-Vice President Joe Biden received payments from Burisma—a Ukrainian energy company where Hunter Biden served on the board—as part of a scheme to protect the company from a corruption investigation. The FD-1023 form—an FBI document used to record unverified tips—includes allegations that Hunter and Joe Biden received $5 million each and references text messages and call recordings with the Bidens allegedly kept by Burisma’s owner, Mykola Zlochevsky.
• New York City agreed Wednesday to settle a class-action lawsuit over NYPD mistreatment of protesters during racial justice protests in the summer 2020. If a judge approves the settlement, the city will pay a total of about $13.7 million to 1,380 protesters involved in the suit. The city agreed in March to settle a similar lawsuit over a police crowd control tactic, and this settlement would maintain the NYPD’s denial of liability or serious wrongdoing.
• Ukrainian defense officials said Thursday any ship bound for Russian ports could be considered a military target, responding to Russia’s threats against ships heading to Ukraine’s Black Sea ports. The exchange of threats follows Russia’s withdrawal from the Black Sea grain export agreement Monday and bombing of grain storage facilities in Ukraine this week. The White House warned Thursday Russia may target civilian ships in its blockade of the Ukrainian coast.
• India’s Directorate General of Foreign Trade announced Thursday the country has banned exports of non-basmati white rice in a bid to keep domestic prices down ahead of elections early next year. The move will likely push global food prices higher, as 40 percent of world rice exports come from India—wheat prices are already climbing after Russia’s exit from the Ukrainian grain export deal.
• Iraqi protesters, responding to an expected Quran burning in Stockholm, stormed the Swedish embassy in Baghdad and set it on fire Thursday. Iraq also expelled Sweden’s ambassador and withdrew its own chargé d’affaires from Stockholm. The offending protest in front of the Iraqi embassy in Stockholm—organized by an Iraqi citizen who had previously burned a Quran in front of a mosque—went ahead Thursday, but did not include a Quran burning.
• The Department of Labor reported Thursday that initial jobless claims—a proxy for layoffs—decreased by 9,000 week-over-week to 228,000, their lowest level in two months. The drop indicates the labor market is still tight despite the Federal Reserve’s efforts to cool the economy with interest rate hikes.

Fleeing the Fire and Flood

Plagued by natural disasters and hostile regulations, insurance companies have been quietly retreating from natural disaster-prone states. Florida’s chief financial officer recently claimed insurance companies are fleeing the state because they’re “woke,” and Florida is, after all, “where woke goes to die.” 

We can detect only one flaw in this otherwise airtight logic—California, where “woke” arguably goes to thrive, is also hemorrhaging insurance companies.